WHOA!!! Talk about a whirlwind of a summer!! I wouldn't necessarily say it went by fast but at the same time, it wasn't exactly slow going. After we moved to Emerald Isle, I began having a hard time being there. Now, it was nothing anyone had done or said. It was merely the fact that I was out of my comfort zone and not in a place I could call "mine." Matt grew up on Emerald Isle so he was completely comfortable being back. Me, on the other hand, struggled. A lot. Towards the end of our stay, I had some pretty big breakdowns. I'm sure I could blame it completely on hormones, but I know there was more to it than that.
As the days drew to an end in the US, I began getting nervous and extremely sad to leave. I kept telling Matt that "I wasn't ready. I can't do this. This is WAY too hard." He, of course, comforted me the best he knew how. How do you comfort someone who is so completely overtaken by the idea of moving out of her home and familiar country to a place she's never been to?? I'm sure my breakdowns got exhausting for him to have to handle but through it all, I know he was (and still is) right there to hold me and help me walk through this major change.
We have been in Grenada almost a week (tomorrow will be one week exactly). As we traveled to the airport last Friday I had knots in my stomach. My family and Matt's mom took us up to Raleigh. As we stood at the counter checking in our bags, I knew the time to say goodbye was coming way too soon. I chocked back tears and just prayed that I wouldn't fall apart in front of the Delta lady. Before we went through security, our families prayed over us. That's, of course, when the waterworks started. I felt like I was trying my hardest to dig my heels into the dirt and not be moved forward. I cried my goodbyes out to everyone and struggled my way through security. The entire travel was spent taking deep breathes. We flew to JFK where we had an 8 hour layover which allowed for us to go into the city to see my younger sister. I was grateful for a quick goodbye with her while we parted ways in the middle of the West 4 St. subway that evening. It wasn't until we were at cruising altitude on our way to Grenada that I allowed myself to fall apart again.
I meant for this post to be about our first week here but I think it's made a turn for something else. As I laid in bed last Saturday night (crying again of course), I told Matt the things I had realized from our travel. God was with us 100% of the way. I know, crazy ridiculous idea. Let me explain.
Several days before we started traveling (one of those nights I needed to cry), I prayed for several things:
1. Our bags would not be overweight when we checked in.
2. Getting through security would be easy and not have any hold ups.
3. Protection over us as we traveled into the city to meet Abbey.
4. All of our bags would make it with us when we arrived.
5. Getting through immigration and customs would not be a hassle.
6. For peace as we arrived in Grenada and for connections to begin quickly.
You want to know how big my God is?? He answered everyone and so much more. Each of our bags were right at 50lbs. No extra charge for overweight baggage. Matt and I worked quickly and smoothly together to get through security and we had no hold ups. When we got back from meeting with Abbey, we were put at the front of the security line (which wasn't moving) because we were flying first class. No problems. Found our way to and from Abbey and my friend Chloe on the subway with no issues. Immigration looked at our passports and Matt's acceptance letter with no extra questions or concerns. ALL of our bags arrived and we only had to pay $60 in custom fees. The best part?? This is what I saw as we landed.
There didn't need to be any words or explanations. I knew immediately that this was God's promise to me. His promise that He will never leave me or fail me. His reassurance that I needed to just call on His name. Every inch of His plan was going like He planned it because we were trusting COMPLETELY on the Lord. How rewarding it is!!! As I look over this past week, I see where my worry of making connections with others here was so silly. I have not only made connections but friends!! The Lord opened up a door for me to be a part of a ladies Bible study. Each morning I have the energy to grasp what scripture I read for that day. I am excited to see what God is showing me. The sadness of not being near my family is hard still but the knowledge of leaning on my Creator in all of my feelings (happy and sad) gives me reassurance and peace.
These moments I have been reminded of what God is doing barely scratches the surface of this past week. I want to leave you with this verse to think on.
"This is what I want you to do: Ask the Father for whatever is in keeping with the things I've revealed to you. Ask in my name, according to my will, and he'll most certainly give it to you. Your joy will be a river overflowing its banks!" John 16:24
A hui kaua....
