Praying Circles

Life can throw us some *crazy* curve balls. What's so awesome is that no matter how crazy that curve ball might be to us, it's not crazy to God. I believe, very strongly, that our Heavenly Father *does not* make bad things happen to us. Y'all, we live in a fallen world that sin inhabits. (I'm not going to go into a "This is the end!! Get ready people!!" speech. Freak not.) However, God is *still* God and He is *STILL* on His throne. No matter how crazy things can get in our lives, HE is still the one who is sovereign. (Sovereign = over-reigns. God over-reigns our lives. Amen!!) While home over the summer, our lives got pretty *crazy*. We got thrown that "curve ball" with some news about my little sister, Abigail.

*The four siblings together this past summer at our "little" brothers high school graduation.*

Let me preface this with saying that Abbey is absolutely my hero. If I had gone to a public school when I was younger and had to write one of those "Who's your hero and why?" papers, you can bet that she would be who I would write about!! When she was four years old, Abigail was diagnosed with RP (Retinitis Pigmentosa). It is an eye disease in which there is damage to the retina. RP is a degenerative disorder and can cause complete blindness. The best way I've heard my mom explain it was "very bad tunnel vision." Her eyes don't adjust to light and dark like a healthy eye would. Think about when you walk from a dark movie theater to a bright sunny day. It takes a minute for your eyes to adjust, right?? Abbey's eyes have trouble adjusting from one extreme to the next. The doctors that my parents went to, told them that Abbey would be completely blind by the age of 12. Of course, news like that is extremely hard to swallow. Today, my sister still has some of her sight. That fact I give all the praise and glory to God for. There are six years between Abbey and me. Trying to understand that my little sister had this disease was hard for me to fully understand. Over the next several years, Abbey learned how to do life in a different way from the rest of us. I only remember a few times when she genuinely got upset, fed up, and mad that this had happened to her. She didn't want to walk around with a cane to help her know where things were. She didn't want other kids to laugh at her and wonder "What's wrong with that girl?" She couldn't understand WHY she had to be this way. It wasn't until an amazing missions trip to New Zealand and Australia for an entire summer that she began to understand, just a little, why. At 12 years old, she was the youngest student to go on this trip with Teen Mania's Global Expeditions. While there, the Lord did an amazing work in her heart. She realized that with her disability, she could reach so many people by just talking about how the Lord was working in her (Of course there is *so* much to this trips story but for the sake of time, I will not go into all those details.). When she returned, there was one statement that stuck out about her story. She said, "The Lord showed me that I was made for a purpose and that there was no mistake with how He created me. After all, I don't have to see all the crap in the world that everyone else does." There was a saying that the group took on as their "battle cry," so to speak. "Kia Kaha" is a Maouri saying that means "Be bold, Be strong." They took this saying as "Be bold in your faith, Be strong in the Lord." She has "Kia Kaha" tattooed on her wrist to always remind her of that. That trip was such a turning point in her life that she went back the next summer!! Abbey grasped Jesus' great love for her on that trip. RP was the "curve ball" to her life but knowing who you are in Jesus?? That's a home run hit off a curve ball!! :) (I'm totally not a baseball fan haha but I'm going to keep going with this curve ball idea!!)

*A high school senior picture of Abbey in her element. Picture taken by Laura Johnson.* 

*Picture taken by Candice Corbin*

Fast forward about seven years and you will see that not only has she gone after what the Lord has called her to do but she has done it in absolute abandonment and trust in Him!! After Abigail graduated high school, she got accepted to Appalachian State University in Boone, NC, for Audio Engineering and Production (Yes y'all, that is recording and producing music. "But how can a blind girl do that?!" Let me tell ya, this girl can!!) Through the music department at App, she has traveled to Ireland to learn about Irish music, and all last summer, she lived *BY HERSELF* in NYC interning with a music production studio (If you ever get the chance to meet her, ask her how much she likes the D train ;). Did I mention that she lives on her own?? That doesn't really surprise me but it might surprise you. ;) Oh!! And let me *not* leave out Alexa!! Alexa is her sidekick, best friend, cuddle buddy, and partner-in-crime. In other words, her beautiful black lab guide dog. :) While in NYC, she found a joy for running. There is a group called Achilles International who helps people with all kinds of disabilities enjoy athletics. She got in touch with this group and started running. This past March, my little sister Abigail, ran the NYC St. Patty's Day Marathon. And yes, she ran the whole way!! When I *finally* saw a picture of her crossing the finish line, I cried tears of joy while repeating, "That's my sister. THAT'S my sister!! That's MY sister!!" Seeing the excitement on her face of knowing the *huge* accomplishment she just achieved was priceless.

*Running and finishing the NYC St. Patty's Day race*

*Alexa, the amazing guide dog. Photo taken by Katherine Freshwater.*

*Love and affection from your companion. Photo taken by Katherine Freshwater*

You will never hear Abbey complain about her disability. In fact, you will hear the exact opposite. You will hear her boasting about what The Lord has done in her life and how in every circumstance, He has always been right there for her. This past summer, we got some news that would rock our worlds. For the past year, she has been suffering from extremely itchy skin. No dermatologist could figure out exactly what it was or why. Night and day, she was just plain itchy. I could somewhat sympathize with her because I suffer from Eczema. However, she did not have Eczema, or any other skin disease. On July 1, 2013, Abbey was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma. I questioned God for why this was happening to her. I was so mad that she, of *all* people, had gotten such news. I was crushed, irritated, floored, and completely baffled. BUT (there's always a "but") the Holy Spirit whispered to my heart something that I will always hold on to. "Jo, I did not make this happen to her. I give life, not death. Yes, God has allowed this to happen but He has already won this battle for her. No weaponed formed against her will prosper. When she was diagnosed with RP, remember how I won?? Remember how a negative situation brought glory to My name?? What may seem as a negative moment to you, is a moment for Me to show my power. This is out of your hands. I am healer, I am redeemer, I AM!! Rest in me, Jo. Rest in me." And that I have. Ever since that sobbing phone call, I have looked to the One that can heal her and I have not once questioned His power. 

*Abbey and I at one of her chemo treatments.*

*Rebecca and Abbey*

There is a book that my MIL gave me called The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson (If you want a *great* read, go pick up this book!!) It is about "praying circles around you biggest dreams and greatest fears." Batterson writes about how our miracle is just a prayer away. When we pray prayers of uncertainty, we question if God *can* do what we are asking. The Lord told the Israelites to circle around Jericho once a day for six days. On the seventh day, they were to circle the city seven times and on then shout. Not only that, they were to not talk for the entire week. Now, lets be honest, don't ya think Joshua was probably like, "Wait.......do what God?????" Here's the thing, it doesn't matter how *CRAZY* God's plan sounds to us. It's HIS plan and HE'S got it taken care of!! All we have to do is circle the promises HE has for us!! Come on, how good is that y'all!! I started reading this book shortly after Abbey was diagnosed. Since then, I have been drawing prayer circles around her. God has promised to heal her. All we have to do is accept the miracle of the battle He has already won over her. 

Last week, Abigail got *great news* from her doctor. "A week ago I had received some encouraging information with regards to my Hodgkins Lymphoma. Results from the PET scan a number of weeks ago showed that I was cancer free, I wouldn't have to do radiation, and that I would be completely the last three of my chemo treatments to get rid of the mass in my upper torso." Talk about joyous news!! Talk about being diligent in that prayer circle!! The day she told me, I was crying, laughing, shaking, and jumping around all at the same time. Haha!! Her doctor told my mom that we could not have asked for a better scan. Praise Jesus!! A week later, however, those joyous feelings would turn to confusion again. Abbey posted, "Yesterday when going in for my 5/8 treatment I received much different news from my oncologist. It appears that there was some confusion in the news I had originally received. Although the PET scan shows great results (very minimal metabolic activity from where we found the cancer) it's impossible to say whether or not I am "cancer free." At this time, radiation isn't off the table, and I am considering my options. I would be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed, but I continue to find my strength through my good Creator, finding joy in the life He gives me abundantly." I do not receive this as a failed attempt. I do not receive this as more bad news. I receive this as another opportunity for God to show His power in her life and through this cancer.
I am back in my prayer circle, circling Abbey. I am not there reluctantly, you can bet on that. Spending time in His presence is not a chore. Spending time interceding for those around you, for those you don't even know why they are on your heart, for those right beside you and far away, spending time praying circles around those situations boosts your faith in the Lord. There is *no way* that the Israelites faith was *not* magnified by the middle of the week. They had to be feeling something, thinking, "God, you're gonna do something big. You are going to show up in a mighty way. Lord, YOU have already won this for us. This is going to be amazing!!" No way they questioned Him by that point!! Surely their faith was multiplied that week. This diagnosis of cancer has not made me question whether God is good or if He can do what He says He will. No, this *crazy* curve ball has magnified my prayer life and faith in my Creator through watching Abigail have to go through this. She is one amazing young woman and absolutely my hero. 

A hui kaua....